On Valentine’s Day, many who should receive a card are overlooked. Here are some recommended card senders and proposed recipients. I’ve taken the liberty to include suggested verses.
CARDS THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN SENT
Oil Industry to Ford Motor Company: Oh, how we love you and your Ford Expedition. You hold the keys to our 300% profit recognition.
Alan Greenspan to Ben Bernanke: A propped up economy will always fall. Without you, it might have been on my call!
Barbara Walters to Rosie O’Donnell: Roses are red. Violets are blue. I’m so happy since you left The View!
Hillary Clinton to Rudy Giuliani: I want you for my valentine, now that you’ve stepped out of line. In New York you’ll always shine. But The White House, buster, it’s all mine!
Reality TV Show Producers to Writers Guild of America: Without you, there were no stars. While you were on strike and in the bars, we managed to make more reality shows full of stupid people that no one knows. Now that our love has come to an end, please know that you’ll always be our friend!
Feel free to ad your own suggestions to this list. It’s kind of fun.
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