The Best Way to Baste a Bird

The Best Way to Baste a Bird

 

Cooks everywhere have begun their search for the perfect turkey recipe, one that can be made without consulting Martha Stewart, Betty Crocker and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. So I’m offering a few time-tested tidbits.

 

First, you’ll want your bird to be visually appealing, not too dry yet fully cooked–or at least thawed. Nothing ruins a festive mood faster than having a guest find a half-frozen neck inside the main entrée. (Don’t ask me how that turkey managed to get his head in there.)

 

It’s best to cook poultry in a baste that provides a lovely caramel colored glaze, a flavorful hint of sweetness and just the right proof level to keep the kids quiet. That’s why I’m sharing with you my heirloom recipe, Bourbon Turkey Bliss.

 

If you have any trouble following this recipe, please let your doctor know. You might be suffering from ADHD, Adult Drinking Holidays Disorder.

 

 

 

Bourbon Turkey Bliss

 

Ingredients:         10-12 lb. turkey, fresh or fully thawed to look that way

                             1 bottle (750 ml), divided, Wild Turkey™ bourbon

 (80 proof or greater)

                             1/3 C honey

                             1/3 C ketchup

                             2 Tbsp. dark brown sugar

                             1 Tbsp. soy sauce

 

Instructions:  Mix 2 cups of Wild Turkey™ with honey, ketchup, brown sugar, and soy sauce to form basting sauce. Set aside remaining bourbon.

 

Brush basting sauce on turkey.

 

Bake turkey in an oven roasting bag at 325 degrees for approximately ½ hour per pound. (That’s the turkey’s weight, not yours.)

 

Drink any remaining bourbon while the turkey cooks.

 

Have someone else transfer the turkey from oven to serving platter.

 

Blissfully serves up to 12!

 

 

 

Read more from Diana Estill, author of Deedee Divine’s Totally Skewed Guide to Life and Driving on the Wrong Side of the Road at www.totallyskewed.com.

 

                       

                       

                       

 

Books as gifts

http://www.buybooksfortheholidays.com/

 

Please join the campaign to purchase books as gifts this holiday season! What else can you buy for less than $20 that will bring joy all year long? Socks warm the sole, but not the soul. Nobody likes cheap perfume. And nothing says “You look like a person who watches too much reality TV” better than a throw blanket. Books educate, enlighten, and entain. Support literacy. Feed an author. Give a gift that offers true value and genuine meaning. (And, yes, making someone laugh does too have value!)

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www.totallyskewed.com

Deedee Divine’s Totally Skewed Guide to Life

It’s a …?

 

Oh, I couldn’t wait to share my new baby news! A book has been born! She is 5.5” X 8.5”, weighs less than 1 lb., has her mother’s image (and sense of humor), and has just been released from the printer. Join me in welcoming Deedee Divine’s Totally Skewed Guide to Life to the world!

 

Description:  From holiday hazards to riffs on road trips and the decline in our nation’s GNP (“Gross Needless Products”), humorist Diana Estill turns loose her hilarious alter ego Deedee to share outrageous advice. Deedee explains why women won’t read maps, Bubbas build the best burgers, and wise men never use the B-word, “budget.”

 

What others are saying:  Well, okay, the book just rolled off the UPS truck—so there’s not yet a lot to report. However, Susan Reinhardt, author of Dishing with the Kitchen Virgin, did provide a blurb. Here’s what she said, “Reading Deedee Divine’s Totally Skewed Guide to Life is like spending an afternoon with your craziest girlfriend, only the laughs are harder and the credit card damages are gentler.”

 

Available now at Amazon.com: http://www.amazon.com/Deedee-Divines-Totally-Skewed-Guide/dp/0979970814  

and

 

 

Here’s the new addition’s photo: